Today’s post is by my very favorite guest poster — my husband. I asked him to share his thoughts about orphan care and adoption from the perspective of a man. I didn’t give him any ideas or prompt him at all… his post surprised me and brought tears to my eyes. I agree with his words 100% and am so blessed to belong to him.
The Compassion Saturated Heart of a Woman
By John Casper
Why are men not more involved in the adoption process? Why does it seem that women are always at the forefront of orphan care? Where are the men? Where are the fathers? You certainly don’t see the facebook groups or large men’s orphan care conferences sold out like you do with women. So, why is that? What gives?
Where are the men?
I don’t know that I have the definitive answer to this question because I cannot speak for all men everywhere. But I can tell my personal experience as a man who loves Jesus, and try to shed some light on a few Bible passages that help explain why I feel the way I do.
I am very much here. You might not hear from me often because I am somewhat quiet. Most of my time is spent in one of three places: at home with my family, at school, or pastoring a teenager. You won’t see me at conferences, you won’t hear from me a lot on Facebook, and I don’t have a blog. But I am very much here. Sure. Steady. Reliable. Solid. All with the help of Jesus, I lead my children and house well (2 Corinthians 12:9, 1 Timothy 3:12).
I love and care for orphans. I love adoption, and believe in its life changing power. I believe this is the heart of God (James 1:27, Galatians 4:5). But it seems Lauren’s love for orphans and passion for adoption is quite special and even holy. It is different than my passion – not lesser or greater – just different. And, I do not feel guilty or out of place because of this. In fact, I believe this is the way God created her to be.
I think Lauren would adopt every single orphan on the planet if she could. Her heart is overwhelmingly cavernous for children in need. She is saturated with compassion and is completely emotionally vested in God’s pursuit of orphans around the world. This is the beautiful way God made her.
Paul instructs Timothy that a good woman and wife is known for her good works, bringing up children, caring for strangers, washing the saints feet, and relieving the afflicted (1 Timothy 4:10). This tells me that God made Lauren to have a compassion saturated heart – especially for the poor and afflicted. And, it tells me that her reputation should speak for itself in her action on behalf of those in need. This is not a super wife. This is a normal, biblical wife. This is a picture of the heart of a woman after God’s heart.
Proverbs 31:20 says that this woman “extends her hand to the poor, yes she reaches out her hands to the needy.” Her heart is made for this compassion. Lauren was made for hand-extending, active, compassionate, and nurturing work for those in need. When she pursues this God-centered calling, her passion lights up. Her spiritual gifts are ignited for service. Fundraising thousands of dollars for adoption, going around the world to bring home her son and daughter, sharing her experiences encouraging others, and raising the banner for adoption and orphan care awareness is a joy to her. It is what God designed her for.
Me? I am here. I am very much involved, and I love the heart of my wife. I am by her side every step of the way. And, as God has designed it, her passion would not be fully possible without a loving, supportive, and leading husband.